Search Results For: death
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Not a day goes by when I dont imagine my death or the death of someone close to me. I just like to plan out all the various ways and peoples reactions to them. Maybe it has something to do with my need to plan years into the future.
My life is all kinds of stressful and hectic right now!! I wish it would just go back to the way it was! I want to be 16 again without a care in the world. Running around with friends, thinking we were invincible and the world was our oyster! But I know thats not going to happen so I must figure out how to deal with it the way it is. But its just so damn hard! I hate being tossed into the “grownup” world, they really don’t prepare you for anything!! I don’t feel like anything is secure
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When I say that, I really mean it. Not in the way of “oh I’m so sad and depressed, I suck at everything, I’m ugly and I want to die” kind of way, no.
I hate myself. The way you’d hate someone you really want to hurt. I abuse myself verbally daily, record it and listen to it. If I could, I would skin myself alive or beat myself to death. If I could, I would shoot myself and gut myself and fucking burn myself to death. I could strangle myself, break my bones and just hurt, hurt, hurt
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Sometimes I think about cheating on my girlfriend… I know I never will though. I haven’t had sex in over a year and she wants to wait until marriage. I love her to death, I wish I could get my sex drive under control
Sometimes I become really aware that I will die and the idea of “everything’s fine now and then BANG! Darkness forever” scares the sh*t out of me.
On the other hand… thinking everyone’s going to die too kinda makes me feel a little better.
I’m at a loss as to how to proceed. I’m terrified of being alone, and yet I can’t see any other future for me. Its a recent realization that when I joke about being a 25 year old virgin whose never had a real boyfriend and never will because she is broken its not actually hyperbole in my mind. I accept it as truth. I will never keep a close friend for more than a year or two, and I’ll never have someone to cuddle with on the couch after a bad day. No one can love me as I am, and after
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I am so tired of lies. Everyone I know has lied to me. He tells me he loves me. I love him. He is my world. But he is a player and I know it! He flirts with every single girl he sees. The only person I could trust, likes him, and lives down the road from him, and hangs out with him, and tries to kiss him. Sigh. And he would let it happen. I don’t have any friends. because i’m shy. But i’m not shy, i’m just upset. I hate my life. I used to be afraid of death. The idea of it all being
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well it was going good till college - the father figure who was a drunk. when college started and well some of high school is when drugs came into the big picture. Lots of drug… everyday. Anyhow back on the story failed outa college 3 times iv had my best friend OD in front of me on my birthday R.i.p. man, 2 weeks after that another one of my best friends breaks his C2 in his neck b.c he got hit by a drunk driver couldnt bring myself to see him for a month, watched most of my friends and my
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A friend of mine died of a massive heart attack this weekend, and it really knocked me for six…
What’s the point in living your life, building up friendships, relationships, careers when in the end, its all fucking pointless…you go away for a weekend, have an asthma attack, drop your inhaler and end up dead… Where’s the fucking justice?
some bitch is making me and my boyfriend argue. we’ve never argued before, but now, we’ve fallen out twice in a couple of months. i love him to absolute death and it is tearing me apart. he always chooses this girl over me, and he doesn’t understand how it makes me feel. i have repeated myself so many times but nothing i say sinks in, he doesn’t understand why i get upset and stuff. i am literally at breaking point..i’ve even considered topping myself..ha. yeahh so, first thoughts of
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My boyfriend never wants to do anything, he freaks out at me when I go out with friends, so now I don?t even try to anymore because I don?t want to argue when I get home. I am totally depressed I am tired of being afraid he is going to freak out at me by saying I am fucking someone else. The way he treats me sometimes makes me not want to have sex with him because it makes me feel bad about myself. I feel sad because I know I am not living up to my potential and I feel like my life is passing
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My father’s significant other likes to do things like throw out your stuff without telling you. I hate her guts. She has this old cat that she always talks to in a really high-pitched voice - like she’s talking to a baby. She loves that cat like it was her child. Now I want the cat to die. Not a bad death though. I want to put her outside one day, and have her die peacefully - then have a pack of coyotes come around a rip apart her lifeless body, spewing hair and body parts all over the
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I wake up at 2 pm everyday and stare at the ceiling. No mirrors in my room. I havent walked outside in weeks. I havent taken a shower?in weeks. I haven?t talked?.in weeks. I don?t want attention. I want death. It?s pathetic, right? Pathetic that I?m too scared to take my own life. I hate myself for being that much of a coward. I?m useless. Why am I here? My parents refuse to speak to me, I?m an embarrassment (so they say). I can?t afford a phone, so I don?t have friends. And this is my computer
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4 years ago I beat a homeless guy until he was unconscious with his shoe untilI found a hammer then I broke his hand. . I drug him under a bus stop because it was winter and I felt bad this was north side PGH. This was the third time this man said he was gunna kill me if I dint give him everything I had he was waving a bottle at me and I snapped. He was crying and peeing before he blacked out something I’m sure he did a lot of. Personally I hope he fucking froze to death. I left that city.
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For over four years we lived together and I have never been happier about anything. I never thought I would have to be without you. I would have moved anywhere you wanted to go. I know we don’t see each other enough right now-I’m trying to finish nursing school and you’re taking 18 hours a semester. I just want to be with you and live our life together, but you left me in one weekend and left the house filthy. Left me to clean up my empty ass house alone. Now you want to hang out and go
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