I keep fucking up my life and i can never forgive myself. I’m such an emotional person and i get emotionally attached and because of that I do things i regret to feel like I’m worth something when in in the end it just makes me feel less and less about myself. I feel so alone, even though i’m surrounded by people who i know love me. I have family, but I don’t know what family is. I have friends, but they all leave me thinking everything is fine. I have myself, but I’m the person I hate the
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I’m falling too deep. This is bad. I got that jealous hurt feeling in my stomach for the first time today. Like…why should I care? He’s not my boyfriend. He doesn’t want to be. He doesn’t want to be in a relationship and dammit I’m not supposed to want it either. I don’t know how it changed. I think it’s because he’s doing everything that makes me want him. He’s staying at just the right distance. Enough to piss me off and make me crazy. Enough to make me swoon when he finally gives me
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I fucking hate how whenever I’m away at college you can never spare 2 fucking minutes out of your day just to call me and say ”hi” or text me asking me how I am… BUT WHENEVER I’M BACK HOME YOUR FUCKING PHONE IS ATTACHED TO YOUR HIP 24/7… so I often wonder why you never answer when I call or text so it makes me really think that because I’m not close enough to be used for something (i.e giving you a ride somewhere or lending you money) YOU’RE NOT GONNA FUCKING TALK TO ME.
I guess it’s time that
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