Got a call from my Mom on my way home today. I was waiting for the tram, and the tram never came, so I walked FOREVER and I missed the 6 p.m. bus and at this point I’m hating my life and wanting to gnaw my fucking wrists open because I have to do this hellish commute every day, my Mom keeps calling so finely I answer the call. And I tell her “Mom, I’m sorry I’m just really tired and I had a shitty day, can we talk later?” and she goes “Oh I just wanted so say I miss you and lets get together
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I have recently told my friend that i’m gray sexual which basically means i have low sex drive so today they were talking about how their boyfriend kissed them. I then said i am going to be forever alone and then they said “too gray sexual for you” . I know its not that big of a deal but I am actually offended by it.
Honestly, i feel like i have no real friends. Every time i think i finally find someone I can forever hang out with or just talk to whenever, they turn out to be somebody else that is either rude, ignorant, or just a really bad friend.
Maybe it’s like how one person told me once. “You’re not as scary as I thought. You would be less intimidating if you didn’t always ignore people and listen to music every time I see you. And you always frown.”
Maybe, yes, i am one of those people who prefer
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Ok, so I’m 30 and been single since feels like forever, and finally I meet a guy at my new job whom is just THE ONE prince charming, knight in shining armor riding in during the sunset and blah blah blah… oh — but it turns out he has three kids and a wife. Nice. So i’m just bumbling on, trying to resist from flirting, when the opportunity arises to meet said wife at the work party; now i’m imagining some baggy, mumsy type, maybe a bit fat and clingy. Well, turns out the lucky lady only looks
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Sometimes I become really aware that I will die and the idea of “everything’s fine now and then BANG! Darkness forever” scares the sh*t out of me.
On the other hand… thinking everyone’s going to die too kinda makes me feel a little better.