Love is freaking annoying. I (an 18-year-old girl) have two great loves in my life: one whom I know doesn’t love me (I don’t even know if he likes me at all), and I CAN’T GET OVER HIM. What’s more, he’s 4 years older than me, and he will always be a small part of my life, because he’s my step-cousin. Which means that I can never forget him and move on: every time I see him (it can be many months in between) my feelings flare up again.
And the other is a very good friend of mine… who’s gay. And
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Why does God love me? I know He made me, but I’ve hated many of the things I’ve made, and I’m worse then them all. I procrastinate, I have no desire for anything beneficial: school, piano, Bible study, prayer, exercise, healthy food, reading, nothing! I week after week, year after year, submit myself to the same pain by committing the same sins. I understand why I am not given any real trials when I fail at what any child could succeed at. I don’t understand why I can’t change, I try to give
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I know this is such a tiny minuscule problem compared to the rest of the world’s problems, but it’s just really pissing me off. I met this guy in September and ever since then, not a day has gone by that I haven’t thought of him. You think I’m exaggerating? I am not. Not a single day, and it’s annoying. So much thinking space in my head is occupied by thoughts of him. I just want to be free already. All I ever think about is how awkward I am around him or all the awkward things I’ve done around
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I’m dreadfully terrified of attempting to hold a job. Even though I have straight-A marks and can clearly qualify for most any kind of career path, I just crumble under sustained time spent in self-supporting drudgery once my depression flares up. I’ve fouled up one career attempt in nuclear engineering mostly because I became chronically depressed with the schoolwork and ceased to make regular efforts, though this was exacerbated by things like death in the family and a police raid on my
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I’ve convinced myself I’m in love with a guy who may actually like me, but he wont make a move, and I can’t because I’m afraid of rejection. Am I good enough for anyone, why is everyone afraid of me? Am I hopeless?