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Posts Tagged With: unattractive

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Burn

Short haircut 47

My wife just got a really short haircut and she looks like a lesbian from an episode of Portlandia. It makes her look so unattractive. She said she was on the verge of tears when the hairdresser first cut it, but I call bullshit. When you get a haircut, you don’t first chop the hell out of it. You take a little bit off at a time. Dyke hairstyling just in time for the holidays. Way to go, wifey. I think I’m gonna grow a big fucking beard and say it was an accident.
Sweat

Gold-digging is not for everyone 185

I went on a three day long “date” with a completely unattractive wealthy man, prompted by my extremely shallow mother’s demands. I slept in a separate bedroom. He was a complete catastrophe of utter social awkwardness and patronizing comments. I was so irritated, I actually faked an email to myself saying that if I didn’t fly home immediately, I was in trouble with work. It was complete with Cc’s and FWD’s. I’m thanking heaven above that it actually worked. I have never felt so …view more

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