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5 years of non-stop pressure

Vomit

Posted 3rd November 2011 513

My parents have ensured that the last 20 years of my life were devoted purely to academic study and nothing else. I had asthma as a child, which I grew out of but my parents did not want me to be socializing with other kids without their approval anyway so even though I wanted to take up a sport I wasn?t allowed to. I wanted to play the guitar but my status-seeking Mom forced me to play piano because that?s what snobbish upper-middle class people do. Perfect academic record throughout secondary school, non-stop. Even though I was fat and miserable. In primary school I had a load of friends, in secondary school precious few, all of them academic overacheivers like myself. I liked my friends lots though, their overachievement wasn?t the only thing about them, they had other qualities too but they have fucked-up, overbearing parents like mine so their other natures wasn?t allowed to flourish, so they became robots like me. I?m in final year of college, done well all along (naturally) but I?m so burnt out I?m doing shit. I want to take a year out or repeat or something, just to get a breather, just to go at my own pace instead of what people expect of me, but my parents say no, buckle down now and work hard like you?ve always done. My parents, my teachers never let me go at my own pace. It?s all been pressure and achievement. I?ve earned the right to do this, I?m willing to work part-time to pay off the fees, I just want to take it easy for once in my fucking life, that?s all.

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