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I Know This Is Nothing New…

Posted 26th December 2011 15

I thought I was fine. I’ve had men lie to me before. But every time, I knew it.

It only hurts when you thought you were stronger then the situation. It won’t hit you until weeks, or months later. And that, sometimes can be the worst part.

You live your life, telling yourself you are just fine. You create scenarios in your head that make you feel strong. You yell in the mirror as if you are really telling someone off. It makes you feel that you have won. But at the end of the day, it is just the mirror. And your words are forgotten to a lonely crowd consisting of yourself.

I cannot truly be angry at this person. Evolution dictates that the strongest win. He was stronger than I. He lied better than I did. Maybe that is just my sad way of trying to let it go.

But it’s true.

I lost, I was the fool.

I never thought that someones lies could have been so wonderful.

I don’t really know what else to say. I want to call this person out. I want to punch him in his face. I want to be the stereotypical angry, vengeful woman. But, I know, this is being a sore loser. If anything I should shake his hand, say, “Good game.”

Let the next round of poker begin.

I see how this has made me a cynic; how I have let myself become a cynic. The worst realization is that I have become him. It is strange to say, but I now do what he has done to me.

Men beware.

He took me in, not as a lover, but as a teacher.

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