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21 years ago my dad decided he wanted a kid, so my mom went along with it, and about a year later, I was born. Since day one, the only one who seems to have actually wanted me was my dad. My mom seems to wish she had aborted me so she could live her life with only my older sister, then would’ve been done with kids. She finds faults in me that I can’t seem to change. I have a job, go to school, I have never been in trouble with the law, I pay my rent, and I’m generally pretty quiet. I try to stay out to avoid coming home, so I don’t anger her. I try and get her gifts, but she usually just lectures me on how she hates them and what I’ve done wrong this time. If I hung myself, she’d only be mad about having to get rid of the body. She wouldn’t care if I was gone. I’m just a stain on her life that she probably wishes was gone. All I ever wanted was my mom to be happy with me and tell me she really cared if I was around. It hurts every day. I some times wonder if it’s because she has a bad relationship with her mom, but then I realize I’m just a total failure as a person. I’m a waste of space. I’m sorry to my friends, my boyfriend, my dad, and the rest of my family. I don’t think I deserve to live, if my own lifebringer kind find one thing good about me. I’m so sorry.
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Posted by Anonymous 16th April 2013
You sound like a good person, please don’t feel bad about yourself.