Posted 28th August 2014 28

It was around this time that stepdad showed his true face to us. He made us feel as though our current situation was me and my sister’s fault. We did not have to do any chores before, which I agree was probably us being spoiled, but he made it a very big point to force us to do all that he used to do which was the laundry, cleaning of the house, and etc (this was because my mom was too lazy to do it herself and made him do it). If we didn’t do it right, if we left so much as a speck behind, we were automatically the most evil children the world has ever beheld. We were not punished like the typical white kids were punished (we’re Asian, by the way)…we were screamed at, mentally mindfucked, gas-lighted, and were told not to tell our mom about it because it would just stress her out. And yet, we thought this was normal! We let him boss us around, degrade us, threaten us with mom going back to jail and our family becoming homeless on the streets…

I was 12 when I decided that I would stay with them indefinitely. And then I was 14, and my sister 12, when our biological father challenged our mom for complete custody…and we decided against him. We decided to stay with our mother and her emotionally abusive husband because we thought we were choosing the “better side” over the “evil side”. Our mom got me and my sister into community college early, and all these academic advances, which made us believe we were doing good by staying with her. I mean, with biological dad, we still would have been in school the normal way and face the possibilities of being shot in a school shooting (<–mom’s reasoning). We were wrong.

Fast forward two years later, 15 years old. The son of a bitch (stepdad) suggested to my mom that we move all the way down to a different southern state (we were somewhere up the middle of the eastern coast, US, before this happened). I should’ve known then for what it was: isolating us from our family and previous connections into a totally new area where the abuser can forge new ones that are beneficial to him. Please note, he was not the sort of abuser who had power over my mother. In fact, she was the one who appeared to sit on his head rather than it being the other way around…however he fed on her ego and told her this spiritual nonsense that Heaven spoke to my sister and told us to move to this new state away from the “devils” that were our previous family members.

She bought it in a heartbeat! We moved, and still we did not know ANYTHING of what was happening to us. We were that daft. He used this ‘Heaven’ thing frequently afterwards to do things from preventing my mother from getting a job to keeping us from learning how to drive at the appropriate age…and then eventually, keeping my mother from going out in public like she used to. There’s this sort of conspiracy she believes in now about these gangsters or communists or something that are after us and her and they’re waiting for a chance to kidnap her in public or something…

He further chained us to this dysfunctional family by suggesting we get a dog. BIG MISTAKE. We got a husky puppy without even researching on the breed or if we were compatible with it because he spoke so well of it and lured us kids into wanting the dog as well…it was a total disaster and he gave it away because my sister did not do her chores right. He has always picked on my little sis for no good reason, and has tried to pitch me against her multiple times. Unfortunately I stupidly went along with it, becoming his golden child for a few years. I regret it terribly. Next was another dog, who, you guessed it, got given away too (but this time, I have to concede, it was due to something reasonable. We were living in a rented home and the dog bit all the walls, no amount of training would stop her). Now we have two dogs, who are better behaved than the others, completely compatible with us, and etc. But they are constantly used as hostages against us so for example, if we don’t do something right, one of the dogs will get given away.

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