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I just got married last month. My wife is three months pregnant. We moved out of the country a few days after we conceived, and we haven’t told anyone about the pregnancy. She’s now three months along, and starting to show quite a bit. We’re moving back home in a week, and I have no idea what to tell everyone. Her family is very strict, and will not be happy with the fact that we conceived a baby before we were married. I mean, what’s done is done now, we can’t do anything about it, but I still don’t want to offend anyone. I’m not sure if we should drop a phone call, or if we should just keep it kind of a “Surprise! She’s pregnant!” and leave it at that. I really feel we’re throwing more fuel on the fire, as we got married young, 21 and 20, and we had been living together for some time, and we took off to live with my family in England for three months.
On top of that, I’m terrified about being a dad. I haven’t a clue what it’s about. I don’t feel I’m ready. She wanted a baby, and that was the subject of our arguments for quite some time, until we both settled on a “not trying, not preventing” agreement. I didn’t think she would get pregnant that easily…
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Posted by Anonymous 15th October 2011
I feel bad for you because a family member of mine is in a similar situation, but you really should have read up on things before agreeing to having unprotected sex if you really weren’t ready to be a father. An average male/female couple has an 80% chance of getting pregnant within the first year of having sex year if no contraceptive is being used.As for the family issue, my advice is to let her be the one to break the news to her family. After all, it is HER family. Be there to support her, but let her know that she needs to do the talking.