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My Roommate’s Fucking Cat

Fire

Posted 12th January 2014 111

When I first moved in together with my best friend and her co-worker I didn’t have much of a problem. That is until my other roommate (Whom I will name June) decided to bring two of the world’s most fucking annoying pets into the apartment. Now I could stand the dog, as the dog is a happy go lucky little gal and she’s very friendly and mostly likes to lay beside you without at problems. On occasion she will pee on the floor, since June never takes her out enough, in which case I have begun to take on that duty for her.

Now I’m not complaining about taking the dog out or feeding it or basically taking care of it since June fucking has a tendency to “forget” to feed her animals for two days in a row before they start hounding everyone for food and are constantly in the kitchen licking the floors. Goodness no! What I’m mostly complaining about is the little fucking shitstain she calls a cat.

Now before you go and say “oh this op is a cat hater” or “what an asshole” no. No no no. I do not hate animals at all. In fact, I have a cat myself named Megumi and a dog named Arwen. I love animals and I volunteer at the Humane Society every Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. If I didn’t love animals then I wouldn’t be wasting my time going there.

But I digress.

June’s cat has got to be the worst and I mean the fucking WORST animal I have ever had the displeasure of being around. He’s a destructive little fucker who chews on the blinds in the living room, he meows CONSTANTLY for at least seven or eight hours straight, he chews on shoes and shoe laces (Which my ONLY pair got the worst end of it and June didn’t even so much as offer to pay me the money for a new pair), he climbs up onto the counter tops in the kitchen when you’re prepping food for dinner and he’ll eat whatever is out in plain sight, he hisses and trips you over when you’re trying to walk around, he chews on cords and he loves to damage laptop cords but the worst thing he did was he flung himself off of the cat tree in the corner of our living room and he knocked my laptop off of the coffee table and caused my laptop screen to come loose from the motherboard resulting in nearly two-thirds of my laptop screen to go black (Of course which June hasn’t even offered to fix my laptop either).

June’s cat is loud, obnoxious, and he’s a trouble-making little shit. As it is we’ve already had three complaints on his loud meowing and if we get another one we will be charged an extra 50$ fee for every complaint thereafter. I can’t fucking stand her cat. He grates on my nerves and he makes me want to send him back to June’s house where he came from so that way her family can deal with him. There is no way I can deal with him any more and it’s only been one month since I’ve moved in with her and my best friend.

If I have to put up with this shit for a whole year then I’m going to fucking go insane.

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