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My boyfriend gets annoyed at EVERYTHING. Like, the most random things too. Things that I would never know how to predict. For example, tonight we were having a really fun, pleasant conversation at his apartment and we were flirting a lot (we’ve been together for a while and our flirting involves a lot of teasing and crude jokes). He had some dollar bills and he started reaching towards me with them. My legs were slightly open and it looked like he was reaching to put them between my legs (I was wearing a skirt). Instead he reached and put it in the waistline of my skirt. So I then said (while laughing, mind you), “Oh my gosh, for a second I thought you were going to put that in my vagina!” He all of a sudden got SUPER offended (the whole angry face and everything) and said, “Wow, I can’t believe you think I would do that. I’m actually super offended.” I seriously thought he was joking about being offended because I couldn’t image how he could possibly be offended by that. So I then asked him, “Really? Are you really offended by that?” Because why the hell would I want to offend my boyfriend that I love? Then he said, “Yes, I am actually 100% seriously offended by what you said.” I proceeded to ask him why that offended him and he said it was because I must think he’s weird if I thought he would do that. So I said he gets offended really easily. He then begins backpedalling and saying that he was never actually that offended and that I (me, the one who was LAUGHING ABOUT HIM PUTTING CASH UP MY COOCH) always take things way too seriously. Even though he told me he was 100% “SERIOUSLY” (this is a quoted word - he said the word seriously, for reals) offended. This was total bullshit. I love my boyfriend, and I don’t want to rant at him. That’s why I’m ranting here. But really, that was so incredibly stupid. And this happens often. He gets offended and something incomprehensible, then I am astonished at the fact that he’s seriously offended, then he claims that I take things really seriously. I know this is a ranting site, but if anyone has suggestions or clarification about this behavior, I would actually really appreciate the input, because this is driving me up a fucking wall.
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