Posted 19th February 2010 1922

I am old enough to not give a shit about this kind of stuff anymore, but for some reason just knowing this chick exists online is enough to make me want to blow up unicorns. She’s passive-aggressive, only acknowledges you if you can do something for her (otherwise she sticks to her gaggle of butt-monkeys), and openly manipulates the game. AND YET: OMG SHE’S SO COOL AND SUCH A GOOD ARTIST AND SO FUN TO HANG WITH! WE LUV HER SO MUCH!!!!!!

AND YET: A metric fuckton of people left the place she was associated with to start another forum because she just couldn’t keep her hands off the plots. If she didn’t like something (or was bored that night) she would do something to sabotage it, usually the plots that upstaged her own. So you leave and so what, who cares right?

AND YET: I find her and one of her chief butt-monkeys lurking on my new site not once, but twice. Both times she stirred up shit just for the lulz because apparently she can’t get enough on the twenty million other sites she lurks on. Ha ha ha, ppl, it was JUST a joke.

AND YET: It was so important to her to sabotage us that she wheedled and whined and lied to get one of our people back on her site. Only to completely ignore them after.

AND YET: Said person is still a mainline of information direct to the Princess Queen Snowflake herself.

I’m sorry, did I die and wake up in a nightmare version of Mean Girls? Okay, the low-rent online version of Mean Girls?

I am confessing that I have never before wished so much for life to smack a person back to earth than I have for this girl. You are not super-speshul. You are not the world’s best writer (which reminds me: ITALICS IS A FONT FACE NOT AN EMOTION G-DDAMMIT). You are a good artist, but so narrow in scope — pencil, paper, try it sometime? — that even your second rate art school will kick your ass and eat it for breakfast. You have a nasty little attitude and if you treat people in real life the way you do online, then all I have to say is damn.

The worst part is, I keep going back to the old site, hoping that one day I’ll catch the S.S. Failboat sinking.

When it does, I like to think I will crack open a bottle and celebrate, but will probably just end up feeling guilty for being so damn mean.

Nah. I’ll enjoy it. Maybe take some screencaps too…

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