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First, you walk the dog on your already bum knee in flip flops and the SNOW? And them you are surprised you twisted it and this all the day before Thanksgiving?!?! So, I am taking care of everyone and the ungrateful neighbor’s fucking geriatric dogs and I have two teenagers who won’t brush their fucking teeth without needing reminding? I had to go MAKE a menorah in order to participate in Hanaukkah because $ is tight. AND THE 3 OF YOU TURN UP THE TV WHILE I PRAY?
Tomorrow, everyone will roll into the kitchen, expecting a turkey and stuffing orgy already in process. And I am thinking of the years I asked to watch the G-d damn parade for 10 fucking minutes and couldn’t get a break. I am also thinking of the tables needing moved and the china pulled put of the attic and I am realizing that I just might eat cold pizza for breakfast and play Assasin’s Creed first thing tomorrow rather than stick my hand inside a raw bird. How’s that for a mom’s prerogative? I will bitch and whine when dinner isn’t ready and maybe go out to dinner. ALONE.
Do not ever look at cans of pumpkin, thawing pie crusts and say to me, “Hey, I can’t stand or sit because of my knee. Do you need help with anything?” W.T.F…
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