Posted 22nd October 2017 2118

Major tl;dr warning. Note I am much older than my brothers. This all happened in maybe ten minutes:

1. Youngest Brother (alias Sam, 12 yrs old, has some sort of undiagnosed behavioral disorder) comes to living area. I’m screwing around on my computer while my other younger brother (alias Lee, almost 14, hit hard by puberty and is probably over 6 feet tall) is rambling on about something to me and I’m not listening. Sam goes to talk to my mom, who is washing dishes. She obviously wants him to gtfo so I say “Hey, Sam, I got that tv show you wanted. Wanna watch it?”

2. Sam says yes, so I tell Lee to fuck off since he’s watching a video on his tablet anyway. He whines and starts ranting about how Sam always gets to do shit and how his show is stupid while I attempt to get him to gtfo. He unplugs his charger and gets up, then…

3. Sam threatens to hit him with his (Lee’s) own shoe. I shit you not. Lee is twice his fucking size and he’s not putting up with this shit, especially since the last time Sam threw something at him he ended up with a pair of children’s scissors embedded in his thigh. So he fucking wails on him, hits him to the ground and pulls on his stupid hoodie-shirt. Sam is starting his fucking crocodile tears but no one gives a shit.

4. Lee leaves with his tablet but leaves his charger. My mom doesn’t give a fuck, and she just says, “I told you last time he would fuck you up.” Sam storms out with the shoe and dumps it in the trash can outside.

5. Mom gets pissed and the two of them have a physical fight over getting the shoe out of the trash. She gets fed up and goes around the house looking for Sam’s shoes. He takes the opportunity to steal her tablet and hide it while she looks. She finds them and tosses them in the trash. The whole time they’re screaming at each other.

6. I tell Sam how much of an idiot he’s being and he storms off to lock himself in the bathroom. I take Lee’s charger and bring it to him, and tell him what was done with his shoe. He cracks up and I go outside to get the shoes out of the trash.

7. Our trash is one of those big plastic things that you roll out of on street. Thing is, Thursday was garbage day so those fucking shoes are now at the fucking bottom. I go back inside to get a flashlight since our outside light is shit. I am not a tall lady, so I end up awkwardly leaning the thing over so i can get at the shoes while holding the flashlight in my mouth. Worse, I’m in a fucking bathrobe. Plus, since it’s Saturday night, the creepy white trash neighbors and the asshole hispanic neighbors are both watching me and chattering away. Great. The only person helping at this point is my cat.

8. I chuck the shoes under the bench where no one will see them and go back inside, declaring “I got the shoes out of the trash can, but I left them outside. They can wear cold shoes to school on Monday.” My mom decides to reply with a snide “They’re gonna get stolen.” And I’m like “I hid them under the bench.” I go back to my computer and she goes on a fucking tirade about how we are the most worthless awful children ever. They she starts crying and OMG it is the most fucking annoying sound like nails on chalkboard mixed with cats fucking. I shit you not. So I “suggest” she go rant on the other side of the house where my brothers are. She goes off on me saying I’m the worst because I’m an adult and I don’t do anything around the house and I don’t have a job.
Newsflash asshole I’m agoraphobic so you know some days I can barely leave the house let alone my room because of it (even though my “safe zone” extends to places miles from my house) and I clean up after myself plus I cooked dinner and did the dishes three times this week while the garbage disposal was broken.

9. I just fucking left at this point and she was still whiny-crying so I turned on my fan to drown it out, even though it is fucking freezing in my room. I spent the next seven minutes trying to calm myself down from a hybrid rage/panic attack. Then I found this website and vented.

Tl;dr: tiny brother threatens mutant tall brother with shoe over nothing, shoes end up in trash, I save them and get all the blame for no fucking reason.
I need a fucking drink.

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