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This is how it is

Posted 24th August 2011 40

I do drugs because I’m too much of a coward to commit suicide yet.

I have no real friends who’d be genuinely concerned about me - all they care about is my money and what I can give them.

My family has no interest in what I do as long as I keep it quiet. My mother becomes anxious at the sight of me and prefers for me to stay as far away from her as possible. My sister steals from me and talks about me behind my back and I pretend to not know about it. My father knows my name but little else even though we’ve lived in the same household for years.

Drugs don’t help me in the long run, I know that. But without them I end up feeling nothing, and I hate that. I want to feel anything at all, even if it’s sadness or anger. This lack of emotions used to be something I was happy about because I thought it made everything easier to bear, but I was mistaken.

I can’t tell anyone about these feelings because I don’t think that anyone cares, so telling them would only make me feel worse.

I’m not asking for help. I just needed to vent for once.

Got something to say? Post Now! It’s totally anonymous… rant or confess about anything!

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Comments

Posted by Anonymous 19th September 2011

I get EXACTLY what you feel like, bro.

Hang in there - life is about YOU and what YOU can acquire and live for before you die. FUCK all the other people, they worry about their own lives so you should worry about your own life.

Posted by Straight edge 3rd March 2015

Just go to a counselor for suicide. You are not to much of s coward to comit suicide, you are two much of a coward to seek help. drugs dont help in the long run. They have terrible effects. I just sudgest to go seek so therapy. It really helps.

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