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To My Needy Female Friend

Posted 29th February 2012 1512

PLEASE DON’T TEXT ME WITH A “FUCK MY LIFE” AND EXPECT A RESPONSE. Geez, I can’t believe you’re over 30. You sound like a teenager, complaining about how you need a new life, a rich boyfriend, and all this other crap. While being discontent with aspects of your life is a good thing when it leads to changes for improvement, you just expect sympathy from friends as if we have no problems of our own. You’re healthy and employed with money in the bank–you are not granted a FML pass. You are also not allowed to complain about being fat after posting about your incredible treadmill progress on Facebook. You have as much body fat as a wood plank. And let’s not forget the tiresome complaints about thinking you’re on your period, really needing a Girls’ Night (after you just had one the night before), and not wanting to date any guys right now when it’s obviously all you think about?.You are “Sh*t Girls Say” personified. I love you anyway. But DAMN.

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