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Women like porn too, but this porn sucks!

Posted 17th July 2011 44

You know what I?m sick of? Lousy porn.

1. Can we see a good-looking guy, please? Maybe some variety? It seems like every damn guy in a porn video is a tattooed, vaguely muscular white or black dude? all roughly the same build. Those of us who like them kind of tall and scrawny have to resort to watching grainy amateurs speaking Russian. Why don?t asian or latino guys ever do porn? Fat? Blond? Long-haired? Maybe some of us would like to watch a girl do a guy who we?d actually, you know, DO.

2. Quit it with the pulling out and cumming on girls? faces! Does anyone ever actually have sex like that? It seems so rude and gross. Besides, if I wanted to taste girl parts I wouldn?t be [imagining] having sex with a guy. Yuck! Geez.

3. All published ?womens? erotica? is such an insult to our sex. Billowing curtains and words of everlasting devotion are only sexy if you have personal involvement with someone, and even then, not really. It?s okay if it?s not romantic. It?s porn, for gods? sake. Rip her bodice off already.

4. It?s silly when you have a perfectly hot reluctance or first-time scenario and suddenly she starts screaming ?f*ck my juicy p*ssy!?. Seriously? Thanks for the reminder that I?m watching porn, jerkface actors.

5. Dude, don?t slap or squeeze her boobs. It really hurts us to think about it! Would you get off on porn where a girl squeezed a guy?s balls really hard? Yeah, exactly.

6. Why aren?t there more menage a trois scenes with two guys and a girl? I mean, doesn?t that make more sense logistically?

7. Don?t ever depict, hint at, simulate or threaten anyone with anything going from bum-to-mouth. Eew! Eew eew eew ewwwwww! I?d rather be shot!

As you can see, girls like porn. A lot of porn just sucks! Make better porn please, porn industry. Thanks!

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Comments

Posted by FuckingStraight 12th May 2012

Word. I agree with your demands!!!

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