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do i exist

Posted 10th July 2015 310

I’m assuming that this will never get back to anyone I know so I’m going to vomit out my anger here. I have glimpsed some of the other posts and in compare mine seems petty but I just need to type this out loud and let it go…… Why is my birthday always such a non event to everyone. I always make a huge deal out of everyone else’s…..yet on mine, my husband and 4 kids do whatever is the least to put the check in the box. I just turned 50 on July 6th, and I got hershey’s kisses and grocery store flowers which were bought likely about 15 mins before my feast of Hardy’s. No cake. We didn’t even sit together as a family….they got their plates and ran off to tv or video games or whatever. This seems pettier and pettier as I type, but I am so tired of everyone saying well it’s just Mom. I put months into Christmas, what did I get this year? Nothing. My husband got several gifts. My children are 23 22 20 and 17. They are old enough to let their mother know she matters. Dollar tree. some piece of shit from the dollar tree to let me know I still breathe. OH, mothers day. nothing! Wow, just re read this and am starting to feel like a materialistic bitch. Honestly does no one in my family know me well enough to get me one meaningful gift and not find some shit to hand me to appease their guilt? I can almost hear their brains….oh fuck it’s mom’s whatever day, lets just grab some shit and fling it at her. The last straw was when my son came in today and told me he is going out of town for a week and expecting several packages…..I can open them if I want and wrap them they are birthday gifts for 3 friends having birthdays in SEPTEMBER!!! Go fuck yourself son! I would give my last breath to save you but go fuck yourself! Well if you read this hateful dribble thanks, but I am now realizing after re reading it that their are bigger problems in the world, I love my family and maybe I raised them this way.. thank you for letting me vent

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