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well aware of peanut game

Posted 23rd July 2014 16

enchanting. also deeply deeply aware of lastnights meeting. 2 different levels. from one it’s like playing with toys. i am not a toy. i DONOT consider others toys. see them walk their paths and do what i can. and hide alot. saying anything tends to make it worse. usually for me soooo sighhhhh. i have said a few things. things aint always what they appear. remain calm. idk a few. i think if i could say something it would be. dont be afraid. warry and skeptical and mad as fuck but dont let fear eat u. oh oh. scattchy and twitchy just dropped bye. i can only see unavoidable and recogniable. really the issues are as clear as the nose on my face. peeps just dont want to deal with them. dont blame them. i dont have any answers i just live my life. certainly my reality is about to explode into a mass of crazy. legal either way going to go extreme. my personal business life looks like a train wreck and i am tired of all the headaches and stress. in every direction.

anddddd repurcussions maybe not as minor as i tht. going to take an anti and hope it dont get worse. certainly it didnt take long for me to wildly search whatever was making me THAT sick. start of journey to effects of technology on biology. purhap in theroy a wildly interesting read, as the gp it had it moments. both good and bad and from different purspectives. lmfao. never going to get the extremes. aint no way peeps r going to bee brain dead enough to by 1/2 that shit. or take it. really i can recall giving serious consideration to the concept of am i capably of killing somebody. i think we established i am. big death penalty flag waver.

idk my life is changing and i with it. my world will bee different. i think i am going off to reality and see the retirement i dream of. i am different. i still think what i always tht…mostly…i do think. i am settleing to who i am to bee. pretty sure it’s going to bee bits of this and that and whatever happens bye at the moment but my world has more form to it. and where i want to bee. ummmm ice cream marked the spot. ;).

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